i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
A bitchslap is in order.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
