I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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