Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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