I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
