I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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