is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize
