the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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