found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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