I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
