Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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