remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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