Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
