Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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