The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Of course I have a pirate flag
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
