love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
