I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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