you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
