I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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