people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
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I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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