And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
