...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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