yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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