she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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