if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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