Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
