i was born a porn star she said
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Someone stole a lamp last night.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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