Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
