Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize