Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
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we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
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Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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