Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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