Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
