my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
