I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I want to be your penis for a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize