Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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