Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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