Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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