operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
