she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
