Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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