Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
