Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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