Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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