I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
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