put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
