Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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