yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
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We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
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So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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