Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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