I wish I could punch you in the face.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Randomize
