Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
