these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
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naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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