yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
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Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
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You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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